I heard that you want to work from home so that you can earn money while staying home with me. That’s really sweet, and I’m sure you have the best intentions, but I’m not quite sure that’s going to fly around here.
You see, my love language is “time spent”, which means that if you are in sight, or anywhere in the house, really, I will find you, and I will spend time with you.
If you bend down to cut a piece of fabric, I will sit on it…or stand on it and slide my feet around.
If you sit down to work on embroidery designs on the computer, I will climb into your head, or stick my fingers in your nose and mouth, or want to nurse.
If you try and close the door to your sewing room, I will scream so loud that Grandma will hear me and hopefully come smack some sense into you.
If you try and sew, I will try and climb onto your lap, using my ridiculously sharp tiny nails.
If you succeed in distracting me for two minutes with an empty thread spool, I will poop in my diaper and make your workspace unbearably smelly.
Hey, are those pins? I wonder how fast I can take them out of the cushion and spread them all over the floor? Last time she caught me before I even got one taken out. This is my day, I can feel it.
Also mommy, just so you know, I don’t like the feeling of the floor on my feet…it feels yucky and I would really prefer to be in your arms. How are you supposed to get anything done with only one arm, you ask? I dunno. You’re the one who wanted kids, you figure it out! I’ll just be right here while you think about it.
Want a kiss mom? Is that your eyeball? What happens when I stick my finger in it? Haha, that was fun! Can I check your teeth? You are so much more fun than any of my toys!
You could always try working during my naptime, I’ve heard that some moms do that. But good luck with:
my new and improved 32 minute nap…20 of which you were rocking me for.
the wall of fatigue that hits you when you realize that for the first time all day you can hear yourself think…..and coffee and facebooking sounds way more relaxing than working.
It’s OK, you can always work after I go to bed for the night…I’m sure daddy didn’t want to spend any time with you tonight anyways, right?
And also, I’ve heard that moms can survive on nothing but coffee for days at a time. Just make sure you keep that adoring smile on your face and loving tone in your voice, especially when I spill the Tupperware full of Rice Krispies on the floor. Aren’t I cute?
I’m so glad you decided to work from home mom. Now you can spend all of your time with me while getting your work done!
Well, at least we get to spend time together, and that’s what counts, right?
Can I have another snack?